God at Work

As I begin my fifth week of project and fourth week of work, I want to give you all an update (since I've been somewhat slacking with this whole blogging thing). So there was about six days of intense job hunting and uncertainty about where I would end up working. As we were hunting, many people were hired by McDonald's, Dunkin' Donuts, and some other local places. As I saw my peers finding success, it was easy to get discouraged and try to take the control into my own hands.  I filled out so many applications- I'm sure I could have done it in my sleep. 

I then moved into a waiting period, anxiously hoping for a call from a coffee shop or retail store. I wanted to work somewhere that, in my mind, would be comfortable or beneficial to work, but then one day it became clear to me that God had a different plan. A friend of mine from project got a call from a motel about a housekeeping job and the place had two positions to fill and wanted people for training. 

My gut reaction to this was, "I don't even clean my own room/bathroom, why would I EVER decide to clean up after other people  for ten weeks?!" But much to my dismay, I felt the Lord nudge me to go in for training the next day. I did so..and I hated it! But I knew in my heart this was the job I was to take. So what did I do next? Following in the footsteps of Jonah, I tried to run the other way, but that night I felt the Lord nudge me again to take the job. I had an unsettled feeling and kept hearing that He wanted me to think of myself less and go to a place that may otherwise be unreached. He also showed me that through those times that the job was difficult, that in my weakness he wanted to be my strength. I obediently called the place the next day and accepted the job.

I have been working in housekeeping at Harris Sea Ranch Motel for the past three weeks and I am so glad I listened to the Lord. He has been teaching me so much about dependence on Him especially in the midst of tasks where I have to place myself after others. At a job where I had anticipated working by myself, it has been encouraging to be able to begin developing relationships with my coworkers and I am excited to see how the Lord will work through these relationships. 

surrendering all: past, present, and future

I MADE IT! I have been in Hampton Beach for six days now and I love it! The house is lovely and homey and the beach is gorgeous! This week I have been babysitting for some staff members while they prepare for project to start. It has been busy and tiring, which I have heard is just a foreshadowing for the rest of the summer, but I have been enjoying every minute. The rest of the students arrive on Tuesday and that’s when project really begins. During this week we will be getting to know each other and all of what project will entail. We will also be on the hunt for jobs, which will begin next Monday. I am incredibly excited to see what the Lord has in store for me over the next ten weeks! 

As I think about the ways this summer will change me, I have become aware of how many things in my life to which, for as much as my spirit wants to let go, my flesh is still holding on.  I believe that true freedom comes when we allow God to have control of everything; to let His will dictate every part of our lives. What happens so often is that I forget to trust Him, and worry rushes in about things from my past (that God has already forgiven), things in the present that I am dealing with, and my hopes and dreams for the future.

The song Getting Closer by the Bridge Band reminds me that God’s love and grace are sufficient for me; that He will “never love me less than the most anyone could.” There is a line in this song that I have decided to make my prayer for this summer, as I have the opportunity to choose to grow in the Lord or “keep on holding onto these [other] things.” The line says, “Jesus, show me how to be free, how to let go of these things that keep me from getting closer to you.” My prayer is to let go of my fleshly desires and cling to God’s will.

wait

The theme of my journey to Hampton Beach so far seems to be WAITING: waiting to be accepted, waiting for all my support, waiting for the summer to arrive, waiting, waiting, waiting. I think Brooke Fraser was right when she said "as I wait for You, maybe I am made more faithful."

But isn't it so hard to wait? I think as an American I have extra difficulty in this area with the idea of instant gratification engrained in me. I want something, can't I have it now? But I believe the Lord has a different view on the matter. Psalm 37 verses 7b&9 tell us to "be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him" and that "the evildoers shall be cut off, but those who wait for the Lord shall inherit the land." Earlier in the same chapter it says to "commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him, and He will act." It is no coincidence that these verses fall in the same chapter. Give your life, your time, your "way" to the Lord and he will act, but WAIT. He will come, He will move, He will work - in HIS timing.

The hardest thing on this journey, the thing that takes the most faith, is support raising - and why is that? Because it is causing me to wait. But as I wait and trust that the Lord will bring all the support I need, I am made more faithful! This time of waiting is not me passively sitting by the mailbox, but rather actively trusting in the Lord and believing that His promises are true, that he is faithful to provide for all of my needs (1 Thessalonians 5:24). After all, isn't that what this trip, my life even, is all about? -seeking first His kingdom.

a little history: making the decision

Since the beginning of my freshman year of college, I have been involved with Cru (formerly known as Campus Crusade for Christ). From the first week of the first semester, I have been attending the weekly meetings, building community with the friends I made and growing in my faith in God. The friends have been a constant encouragement to me in my walk with Christ. 

Growing up going to church and Christian school, I have known what I believe about God and his display of love (Romans 5:8). I accepted Christ into my heart at a young age and was always sure of my salvation from that point on (Romans 10:9). The thing that was different between then and now is the personal relationship with God that I now know I have. I knew that God loves me and that he wants me to go to heaven, but over the past year and a half I have been discovering what it means to live in relationship with my Creator, Lord and Heavenly Father. 

These past few months especially have been a time of growth for me as I pursue knowledge of and relationship with God. It was clear to me from the beginning of this year that I need to do something worthwhile this summer - something that will challenge me to grow in my faith, something that will allow me to be part of furthering the Kingdom of God. I had been hearing about summer project from my friends who went last summer and each of them experienced spiritual growth and increase in boldness throughout the summer through intentional quiet times, living in community with other believers the same age, and being taught and challenged by older believers to share their faith. Hearing about these things, I decided that, Lord willing, I would go on a summer project this summer.

The next decision to make was where. This was pretty simple in that before I knew I would go on a summer project, the Lord layed this location on my heart. I was caught by the history of the Hampton Beach project when i heard it for the first time at Cru's winter conference during my freshman year and could not get that story out of my head. In short, the project almost closed down a few years ago, they had packed up all the things in the house, trusting that this would be the end of summer project in Hampton Beach. However, the Lord had a different plan. He put it on the heart of a local couple to buy the house, in which the project had been. This was a clear sign that this project was not meant to close down; that the Lord still had things he wanted to do through summer projects in Hampton Beach.

This story stuck with me for over a year and when it came time to decide where to go, I knew wanted to be part of what God is doing in Hampton Beach. I am so blessed to have been accepted onto this project, and am excited to see what the Lord will do this summer!